23 November, 2009
Today is one of those introspective days for me.
I realize that I am talented.
Sadly. I have know clue how to channel it or put it to use. I feel like at every turn when I attempt to be of service or use, I am blocked at every point. I know we still press forward so that you may over come adversity. However, there are times in our lives that we must realize many of us DO NOT not want a hand-OUT!! A hand-UP is much better! Trust me when I say SOMEONE helped you accomplish your goals in some form. No one is asking you to invest your energy into someone who is not worth it. Hence the scripture "Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces." Matthew 7:6*
Although, people if you honestly see someone who YOU know is talented, You KNOW they are definitely making an effort to improve their lives. Stop standing as a bystander offering WORDS of encouragement. Why not put in some SWEAT Equity into their lives and HONESTLY help them? Do it in such a way where they do not feel like a charity case, that you're being judgmental or feeling SYMPATHY for them. Have some empathy for them. Do you all know the difference between Sympathy and Empathy?
Sympathy is when you feel FOR the person; you’re sorry FOR them or pity them, but you don’t specifically understand what they’re feeling.
Empathy is when you feel WITH the person. To an extent you are placing yourself in that person’s place, have a good sense of what they feel, and understand their feelings to a certain degree.
Everyone is not at the pinnacle of success or has reached a platform in their lives where they are COMFORTABLE. Some of us are still attempting to kick down doors, knock down walls, climb over fences, go through windows when doors have been shut, climb trees and walk on roofs when windows been locked...basically doing whatever however to make their dreams and goals a reality too! Just because you have reached your goals LOOK AROUND there are many of us who still have NOT!!
I am sure if you took the time, you would see there are people in your immediate circle that could benefit from your assistance. You don't have to seek some volunteer organization, a youth group, senior citizen home or a non-profit organization. You have family & friends that you can seed into and see an immediate return on your investment. All investments do not reap dividends over night. They all take time. Just continue to seed into your investment. Also let me clarify seeding into an investment does not mean finances at ALL TIMES. Sometimes you do what is needed at that time. Sometimes it could be assisting someone get a job, get back in school, improving their resume, connecting them with someone in YOUR network that may help them even more than you, give them a book to read, drive them to an interview, pick them up/take them to work. Maybe doing something for their children (if they have children) that otherwise would not be done. Take the kids out on a day trip, whatever you can think of. Evaluate each circumstance and see where you can help.
Once you invest into this individual do not be boastful about your investment.
Do what you do with purity -- from a pure heart and in silence.
No one else needs to do know that you "hooked up" Jeanetta with your friend who makes web pages. Or that you had to leave work early to take Bryan to a job interview. Or that you "made some calls" so that Andrew could get the job. Or that you paid for Laurens tuition/books! It is no ones business except you and God the things that you do.
If you want a blessing BE A BLESSING.
So this Thanksgiving dont just be grateful for what you have. How about lending a hand-UP to others so they too can be Thankful that you have been a blessing in their lives AND Thankful that you have chosen them to be a recipient of your LOVE & WISDOM!
*(New International Version, Holy Bible)
Now that we are post-AMAs (American Music Awards) it behooves me to blog on the last performance given by American Idol runner-up Alex Lambert. I was so appalled by his performance. He simulated Oral sex on the stage not once, or twice but several times through out the performance. We shall not talk about the vocals, they were horrific in themselves.
I am sick.
Sick of Television & Music Media taking advantage of the public intelligence and integrity.
It appears that we as an American viewership have been leveled down to the brain capacity of baboons. And I for one am tired of it! Last night watching the American Music Awards freak show was just it for me. I have been on this steady decline of watching TV for sometime now and have been completely content with using my laptop as my means of viewing quality programming THAT I HAVE SELECTED and not what another deems to be quality for me. Don't get me wrong, there are some decent channels History Channel, A&E, Discovery...however many of these channels are per a cable subscription and if you are operating within a budget you are subject to your local channels plus some video channels that may be free.
Many of these popular shows that so many people LOVE & ADORE are on my **ish list. I can not stand any of the Soap Operas, I refuse to watch Greys Anatomy, Desperate Housewives, The Real Housewives of ANYWHERE, or etc...
Some of you may say AW WW Fawn, you are just a prude and taking it to serious and too far. Uh NO I am not to both statements. I am a grown Sexually happy woman. I am comfortable with who I am. Trust those who are close to me can vouch for it. But there comes a time when DAMN do we have to be subjected to the buffoonery and foolishness that is broad casted over these television/radio/satellite waves?? It does not matter the ethnicity of those partaking in the buffoonery and foolishness. Before I get those who say I am talking about black programming i.e. BET, hey if the shoe fits!!
However, I am talking about ALL programming.
And I do mean ALL!!
I had someone say to me, I was upset about the Adam Lamberts performance because he was gay. Again, those who know me, know that statement incited nothing but fire missiles back at that person because hoonay I love my Gays, WORD! LOL!! I am the furthest thing from Homophobic.
Respect, Integrity, Intelligence, Morals, and just overall good programming transcends sexual orientation and race. As I told this person, When Madonna did it on the AMAs in the late 90s I hated it then. Every time I see a Music artist create a video and they simulate that foolishness in there I hate it too. Can somethings just be left to the privacy of our own bedrooms??? Does every dog gone thing have to be publicly viewed? I mean I know sex sells, I am not that naive, however can we have just a little restraint? JUST A LITTLE, leave a little to our imaginations you know??
Where are our standards?
Whenever I turn the television on do I have to question what is going to be presented to me? We are living in a time where the youth of today are completely desensitized to integrity and quality of programming. They have seen and heard so much that EVERYTHING is OK and acceptable. From clothing, to how they act in school, to what they listen to, to what they eat and what they drink. Come on y'all when we were coming up, your parents would look at you sideways if you asked them to go to a Starbucks coffee shop and buy you some coffee. SAY WHAT? You want a Venti Caramel Mocha Latte?? You say you want a RED BULL or Crunk Juice?? Please you barely got a sip of their morning coffee let alone some gourmet artisan mixed coffee and had to beg for Hawaiian Punch!!
My point is where are our standards?????
Our parents understood what sugar did so hence many of us did not have much of it around our homes. Much of the food, drink, television and radio taste we have acquired occurred in our adult years through our own experimentation. Not through parental exposure. I have a two-year old and he watches TWO channels seriously! PBS kids and Nick Jr. And even then I am sitting there watching Yo Gabba Gabba real good to make sure he is not doing something questionable!!
We must become a stronger voice with these media conglomerates and let them know our outrage in what they are presenting to us. Somebody saw that dress rehearsal that Adam Lambert did and they STILL let him go through with that performance NOT QUESTIONING ONE IOTA that there would be a vast majority of us who honestly did not want to see that foolishness!
Oh well, back to the internet I go for my select programming at least there I can select what I personally watch and not be forced fed buffoonery and foolishness!
15 October, 2009
We all have heard the infamous saying "Let go and Let God". Such a simple five word phrase. However, it is one of the most difficult things to do. Our society has taught us since we have known how to walk and talk, to become self-reliable, independent, focused individuals. One of the sayings I was taught early in my life was "I am the Captain of my fate, the Master of my soul." We place such high emphasis on your level to create and maintain opportunity for yourself and if you are unable to do that; that thereby deems you a failure, unproductive, or a follower.
We are supposed to be mavericks in this here world. Our own personal Christopher Columbus or Ponce De Leon. Although, what one fails to acknowledge is even Chris Columbus did not find America solely on his own. Forging out your own footpath in this world can be a hard, lonely and at time a vicious process. Dealing with life's curve balls on your own also can be a challenging ordeal. Recently, I have been listening to Donald Lawrence CD, The Law of Confession it speaks about how our words hold so much power and how if we would only look to God's word for our relief and answers, we would overcome all challenges and situations that face us.
As I was looking for my picture for my blog today I came across this poem that so eloquently sums up our stubbornness as God's children:
As children bring their broken toys
With tears for us to mend,
I brought my broken dreams to God,
Because he was my friend.
But then, instead of leaving Him
In peace, to work alone,
I hung around and tried to help,
With ways that were my own.
At last, I snatched them back
And cried, “How can you be so slow?”
My child, He said, ” What could
I do” You never did let go.”
If we would only submit to his will and Let Go. It is such a simple thing to do. It is not some Sudoku puzzle, some Algebraic problem, some Logic question that has your mind boggled. God commands us to simply LET GO.
**"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."** Matthew 11: 28-30 NIV Holy Bible
14 October, 2009
The following is a devotional I wrote 6 years ago.
Fawn1 / fôn / n. 1 deer in its first year 2 light yellowish brown---adj.
Fawn2 v. 1 behave servively (of or like a slave) 2 show extreme affection [OE]
Have you ever thought about how the name you have has an immediate interaction with the person you are or become? Read various articles or books and they all tell you to take careful choice in the name that you give your children. They have websites that can analyze a name and tell you your astrological chart. They have books that can give a characterization on the person you are just by the meaning or letters in your name.
I remember when I was a teenager, my cousin and I used to play a game where we would write a boy's full name with our name, give the letters a number and then add the numbers with ours. Depending on the sum of the number it told you if the boy "loved" you or not. Funny, the games we play as children, never realizing that there is always some truth in error. Don't get me wrong I am not saying that the children's game actually was a correct game, but the premise was there---what's in a name?
When I researched my name I was amazed to find the meaning of my name so closely paralleled the woman I was/am. Lets break it down, shall we? With the exception of the common meaning that Fawn means baby deer, Fawn also means light yellowish brown. Well, oddly enough I must admit that my skin tone is one of a light yellowish brown complexion. Fawn also means to behave of or like a slave, I am not ashamed to admit at one time, I have behaved with a slave mentality. Lastly, Fawn means to show extreme affection as in---Why is she fawning all over you? Herein again, I have to acknowledge that I have behaved in such a way in the past. You think my mother knew that I would so closely become the name she chose for me? Honestly, I don't think so. My mother was a Waccamaw Indian, so I think she was doing what is common in that ethnic group and that is to name your children after things of nature.
Who am I, you ask?
That is a very good question---Until recent years I was never able to answer that question for myself. For years I struggled with defining who I am. Always finding a way to become what others needed me to be. My life has been riddled with tragedy and disappointment like many; I believe it is how you deal with that tragedy and disappointment that counts. My mother was 34 when she died and I was 11, at 18 my paternal grandmother died; at 21 my paternal grandfather died, at 26 my father died and at 27 my maternal grandmother was the last to die. Through all of these deaths, a part of me would die with them and a part of me would be reborn. I learned from experience that life truly was survival of the fittest and you either move on or life moves on with out you.
After battling four years of depression, five years of low self esteem and seven years of questioning God. I finally came into my own realization that who I am as a person does not have to measure up to be what others would have me to be. I realized that who I indeed am is a wonderfully made, beautifully designed and intricately created child of God! I realized that at every valley in my life that my faith is what sustained me and brought me through. I realized that God was truly a God of grace and mercy. I also realized that Gods plan always has meaning and it is up to you to be willing to allow him to show you his plan so you may gain understanding of the past, present, and future.
Sometimes as humans we tend to limit God and what he can do for us.
We are visual creatures, we must have something that we can tangibly see, hear, touch, taste or smell. If what we are seeking does not fall within one of these five categories we tend to lose hope, gain doubt and disbelief. What many miss out on is, God does use the five senses to talk to us each and every day. It is up to you to pay attention and use discernment in what method he is using to speak to you. I have learned to be more in tune with Gods voice and to stop looking for the BOOMING theatrical voice from above to come and rescue me or stop me from doing something. When you acknowledge his small wonders, pay attention to life on a daily basis and thank God for his grace and mercy consistently; you begin to realize that everything is really all in control. You learn to really Love God deeply and passionately. You learn to have such a strong dependent relationship on him that when troubles come, you can really say "This too shall pass" and BELIEVE IT.
So I end this by asking the question I started with, "What's in a name?" Well there is comfort in a name, there is love in a name, there is strength in a name, there is courage in a name, there is peace in a name, there is patience in a name, there is determination in a name, there is success in a name, and most of all there is POWER in a name.
Whatever your name may be always know that you are a child of God, and in his name you can do ALL things. So whether you call him God, Allah, Yahweh, Abba, Jehovah-jireh, Jehovah-nissi, Jehovah-shalom, Jehovah-shammah, or Jehovah-tsidkenu never ever forget to call him for he is your lifeline and sustaining power.
**I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father. And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father. You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.** John 14: 12-14 NIV Holy Bible
06 October, 2009
Well, I have been watching the news and just paying attention to local, state, national and world events and this is what I have observed. Let me preface this by saying if this does not apply to you do no take it personally -- but I am recognizing the blatant disrespect that many Caucasian(White)people have for our President Barack Obama.
Now I make this statement after having conversations with MY FRIENDS white & black alike. And WE ALL have recognized the same things.
All other Presidents are addressed formally as PRESIDENT so & so but noooo the media outlets float between Barack Obama, Barack, Mr. Obama and President Obama. When has it been OK to address the PRESIDENT any other way other PRESIDENT?? I mean come on?!
The whole Joe Wilson "You Lie" situation - when has it been OK to shout at our President?! This isn't Parliament, some sports game or some college debate!
You have been at work and have heard the water cooler conversations, talk radio and home conversations that people have been having about our President.
Now I am calling upon you all the be really be honest. You know I am being truthful and I do not dive into the race pool without reason. I really don't want to say it is race but dammit it is what it is! I may not agree with President Obama on his policies and his decisions but dang gone he is still my ELECTED PRESIDENT!! My goodness, I mean come on -- is it that deep that you all do not want a black President??? I mean really??? Is it that serious?!
I for one could not stand -- and I will repeat I COULD NOT STAND President George W. Bush but I was never disrecptful in my reference or addressing him. These days these people all but spit in President Obama's face and try to treat and talk to him like he a common man.
Well hello people all that stopped when he was elected President! YOU MAY NOT HAVE ELECTED HIM -- but he was elected by the people and for the people no less.
So chill and stop with the foolishness and disrespect because it is really ridiculous and insult to us who see the office of PRESIDENT as a highly regarded and respectful position.
That's my two cents!
05 October, 2009
Well, hello world! I have been wanting to do this for a while and for whatever reasons I have just started this today. Let me give you some background on who I am before I(we) proceed. My full name is Fawn Nicole Rhodes, I was born in Wilmington, NC where I currently reside. However, I have not always lived in the beautiful state of North Carolina, I have also lived in Georgia & Pennsylvania. Now that we did the geography lesson, I am a 36-year old single mother to an energetic 2 year old boy, I have some higher education although I have not completed my degree, which we will get into discussion on this blog. Lets see, I tend to be a pretty open woman about most topics and as the saying goes I am not so "heavenly minded that I am no earthly good", again you will understand more about this statement later. I enjoy cooking, reading, listening to music, being in the company of family and friends and most of all I enjoy my solitude!! I am a gadget/media head -- love gadgets and I am a YouTube addict.
So that is the gist of it..As we move further you will learn more and hopefully you will find similarities in your life, points you agree with or hdisagree with and as I grow --- you grow. So without further delay, lets get right into the meat and potatoes...as one of my favorite video blogs Qaadir aka Timaya would say.