What life just taught me In a matter of 20 min.
Made Dynnie breakfast, put it in his favorite plate. Eggs, Turkey Bacon. Toast and Ketchup. Dynzcil goes into the living room and instead of sitting at his table he gets on my beige couch and spills ALL his food. Comes into the kitchen to say, "Mom, I spilled my food!"
Honestly, I stomped in there with the Resolve, yelled at him "You never listen to me!", "Why do you listen to your God parents but disobey Mommie?" Was just about to say something else when God told me to hush and just clean it up. (Really was about to seriously cry). I cleaned up the food, it was salvageable -- just ketchup stains more than anything. Would've done no good to spank or say words I did not mean - since he really didn't mean to do it. As people it takes a lot to NOT react in a negative way - it really takes a lot of energy to do the right thing and think the right thoughts. I realize that I am sick so my temper is short so I need to be mindful of what I might say.
I sat down and just prayed to ask God to teach me how to love my son. Pour into me the instruction and guidance that I need so I can show him. Show me the flaws in me - so I can help him overcome the flaws in him. Forgive me of where I have wronged unintentionally -- so I may learn to forgive him. Its not easy -- but I feel better and will be better. He's sitting at his table, saying he apologizes and crying as we speak, so excuse me while I tell him it is ok and he is still loved.